Friday, April 16, 2010

Welcome to Holland

As we prepare to move tomorrow and leave the first house our children have lived in, I'm reminded of a poem that I read early on in this journey.  Actually, my dear friend Sheila reminded me of it the other day and it is very fitting for this particular night.  It also explains, in more detail than you can imagine, many of the feelings that we have felt, are feeling and will continue to feel throughout the path God has planned for us.

I hope you all have had a great week!  I'll update soon with pictures of our knew location!

WELCOME TO HOLLAND


c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved


I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. 


It's like this......


When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.


After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."


"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."


But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.


The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.


So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.


It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.


But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."


And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.


But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow! What a great poem to help us understand parenting children with special needs. Praying the move goes well and things all find a new place. Isaiah 32:17-18 prayer for a new peaceful dwelling place.-Caroline

Anonymous said...

I love this! It's so important to remember that, as she said, the place we've landed is just different. I think sometimes about what my life had been like if I'd been able to keep Charlie in 3 1/2 more months like I was supposed to - but then I realize we wouldn't be the parents we are and he wouldn't be the kid he is if our circumstances had been different. And for all the frustrations we've experienced, I'm still the happiest I've ever been, being a mom to my sweet boy.
I would love to post this on my blog as well - I hope you don't mind!
Love, and best of luck on what I hope is an easy move!
Marie

Prayers for output!

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